Beatree13

In the tenth grade I made a new screenname for AOL (because AOL dial-up was the cool thing back then). Beatree13.

Because Psalm 1: 1-3 says:

Blessed is the man who walks not in the counsel

of the wicked, nor stands in the way of sinners,

nor sits in the seat of scoffers; but his delight is in

the law of the Lord, and on his law he meditates

day and night.He is like a tree planted by streams

of water that yields its fruit in its season, and its

leaf does not wither. In all that he does, he prospers.

And so from the first time I really studied that verse, my goal in life, the thing I worked towards, was being a tree.  Being something that is always growing.  Not a fire that can be put out, but a tree that always grows, always is becoming more beautiful and more functional, and more fruitful.

Recently my life has seemed to be at a standstill.  School is on hold for the semester, I’m not moving on to marriage like so many of my friends, I’m not starting my career like most 23-24 year olds do, I’m helping  with the youth at church (mostly pretending like I still am a youth), I’m working at a camp, and I’m living at home. Standstill.

And it’s not that I don’t think these things have purpose.  I know they do.  And I love these things (ok, most of them).

So today, my RSS had a new post from the Bo Parker. And when I saw the title, I got excited.  And then I read the last paragraph (which I would include, but i really think you should just read the whole post).

This season of my life seems SO long.  It seems so boring and purposeless, and sometimes so lonely, but when I realize that God is growing me and changing me for something, that’s exciting.  And when I realize that I’m having to stay in this phase of life for so long because quite possibly, His plan for me is much too large to only train me for a couple of weeks or months, I know that it’s worth it.

So for now, I’ll keep growing fuller.  I’ll keep (hopefully) producing fruit.  I’ll keep watering myself.  I’ll keep being a tree.

Songs for the Ride

It’s that time of the week. We are over the hump. It’s almost time for the 3 days where ideally we’d ride around in the beautiful sunlight listening to our favorite songs.  If we are so lucky, here’s what you’ll hear playing if you happen to ride along with me.

1. Break Every Chain by Will Reagan and United Pursuit Band–  yeah, yeah.  I broke the rules and had the same song on my list twice (and within a month). Don’t be surprised when it happens again next week.
2. Power of the Cross by Keith and Kristyn Getty– my favorite song to sing in choir happens to be one of my favorite songs to listen to while I’m driving down the road.
3. You Won’t Relent by Misty Edwards– “Come be the fire inside of me until You and I are one”
4. Thief in the Night by Leeland– any song that refers to the Church as the Bride of Christ will at least make me smile.  Any song that does that and is by Leeland will make the list. Period.
5. Clinging to the Cross by Tim Hughes– mmmhmmm.
6. Lord of Lords by Brooke Fraser– mmmhmmm.
7. Foreverandever Etc… by David Crowder Band– don’t you feel like you should be skipping through the park with your three best friends by your side?  I do.
8. By Our Love by Christy Nockels–  this should be the song for a video about African children who need our help.  I’d give them money if I heard this song!
9. Hallelujah by Bethany Dillon– I really really really really really like this song, but it loses a little of it’s awesomeness when I realize that at some point some girl in some pageant (obviously in the Bible Belt) probably did a lyrical dance to this.  That kind of makes me want to throw up.
10. Messiah by Phil Wickham– I definitely get distracted from driving when this song makes it’s way through the crowds and into my speakers.

I think you can tell a lot about my mood every week when you see my favorite songs of the week.  Some weeks you’ll read them, and know immediately that all I want to do is sit in a canoe or go on a hike.  Other weeks you’ll see them and wonder how much caffeine I’ve had.  Still other weeks, much like this one, you’ll find me to be more introspective than usual.

Free

I can’t stop thinking about it.  It’s all-consuming of my thoughts, currently.

There is power in the name of Jesus to break every chain.

There’s an army rising up to break every chain.

Everyday it becomes more clear to me exactly how mighty this power is, and exactly how great this army is.

My chains have been broken.  My shackles have been released. I am free to dance, and sing, and play, and run full speed towards the Creator of the universe.

Yeah.  He broke my chains.

Kid Things

There are some things I think everyone should experience before they leave their parent’s homes. Whether 4 years old or 14 years old (or in some cases 24 years old).  These are just some of the things that have brought special memories to my adolescence and early adulthood, and some of the things that I want my kids to experience before they leave the nest.

Pick apples in an orchard.- No, you shouldn’t stop in the little shop right next to the parking lot. You should climb the ladder and pick the most delicious looking one and then eat it as you walk down the rows and rows of apple trees.

Make homemade anything with their mom.- Cookies, Pizza, Cupcakes. Anything messy.  Anything delicious.  Anything that mom knows how to make.

Have game nights.- Phase 10, Scrabble, and Mexican Train.  Maybe not every single week, but often.

Go tent camping at the beach AND in the mountains.- We live in the most perfect place for that to happen.  We are close to both and the weather here is perfect for camping in the spring or fall. Every child should be able to pitch a tent and make s’mores by middle school.  That’s just my opinion, though.

Play in the sprinklers.- Not just once.  But enough for them to automatically think that that’s what you are supposed to do in the summer.

Let my children take me on a tour of their favorite places in the city.- Favorite restaurant.  Favorite building. Favorite park.  Favorite everything.  (This might be especially fun when they are just learning to drive)

Play football in the backyard.- On thanksgiving with the whole family or on Sunday afternoon with dad.  Or both.

Oh gosh, there are so many more things.  But these are some of my favorites.

Without Words

You know those days where it’s perfect outside, and you want to paint on the walls all sorts of whimsical things, and watch good movies, and pick flowers and swing on swings?

Today was one of those days.

Reminiscent. But without any memories to reminisce, today.  I think that might be the word to describe this. Maybe not.  Most of the time my heart doesn’t know how to form words.